Caring for Grandma
My husband’s mother is not doing very well these days. She is 88 years old and still lives in her own house. She has not been eating well, and is often found in bed when one of her children comes by to visit. My husband and his siblings do take good care of her, but where are the grandchildren to help? There are 11 of them, and none of them come over to actually do anything for her. They drop by to show off their young children and then leave. Why don’t they help out?
Rachel
What about the Urn?
My father-in-law died this week and he has just been cremated. What are we suppose to do with him now? My husband would like to bring the urn home and keep it forever. This idea drives me crazy. What should I do?
Pat
No longer Welcomed!
My Mom just left last night. She was with us for 10 days for a visit. We live about 2,800 miles apart, so it was great to have her here. My wife told me this morning that my Mom is no longer welcomed here. I had no idea that there was a problem that would cause my wife to make that statement. Should I persuade my wife to let my Mom continue to visit us?
Alex M.
Why do I have to pay?
Things are tight for both me and my parents. None of us have alot of money and helping them is really hard for me. They are in their mid 70’s – I have helped them out for a couple of years. How long is long enough to help them out? Why should I be expected to help them out?
Lm
Does this seem cruel to you?
I was talking with my brother who lives close to my Dad’s seniors’ residence. I live 2,500 miles away and miss being there. David was telling me about how Dad’s hearing aids went missing a couple of months ago. Since then, my brother bought him new ones, but only lets my Dad wear them when he goes to visit him. David visits my Dad once a week. When he arrives he lets my Dad use the hearing aids. When David leaves, he takes them with him. He does not want to keep paying for hearing aids, he is afraid that the new ones will also go missing. I think that this is crazy and cruel. What do you think?
Joe
My brother did not tell me.
Mom lives in a senior’s building and recently needed emergency surgery. Without the surgery she would have died.
My brother and I have not spoken in years. He has POA for her. My brother did not bother to tell me about how sick Mom was or that surgery even happened. I only learned about all of this from my aunt. How can I get my brother to tell me when things like this happen?
Chris:
Nothing But Fighting
My siblings and I are doing nothing but fighting these days. We all agree that Mom and Dad need more help, but we cannot agree on what kind of help, who should help or how much all this help will cost. I don’t want to do the actually helping out, I work full time and have kids to raise, but I do want to make sure that there is enough money to take care of them and it would be good too if there is money left over for me when they die. I have bills and responsibilities. I want the best for my parents and me too, but how can I get my siblings to see things my way?
Irene K.
Dad’s New Girlfriend
My Mom died 4 years ago and my Dad has been very lost without her. He is now dating a woman that none of us like. My Dad does not have alot of money, but we think she is a gold digger. I am afraid he will marry her and then give her everything – including his house.
Glenn
Jealous Husband
Can you believe it? My husband is jealous of my mother. He tells me that I spend too much time with her, do too much for her and never enough for him.
Stretched to the Limit
Waltzing Into Town
My brother and sister-in-law arrive in two days for the holidays. They bring lots of gifts and act like guests. Neither one does much to help my Dad while they are here. Most of the care giving is still done by me. I am sick and tired of them doing virtually nothing. What should I do?
Anne