From Jane
I’m 44 and my father who has been ill for a long time passed away last Sunday.
He sexually abused me most of my life, but i was able to disassociated, and put my daddy and the monster who abused me into different *boxes*
I loved my dad, and that is/was the only way I could deal with it. He did admit the abuse, we cried for hours and he apologized years ago.
I wanted my father to die, he was suffering so much, and in so much pain. He was also killing my mom as she tried to look after him. She has MS and fibro.
Now I feel so guilty and I feel like I’m a ice sculpture which has been shattered. I’m reverting to a little girl, calling and crying out for my daddy, yet I’ve got shadows of the darkness from what he did to me, haunting me.
It’s not like it’s something I can talk to the family about. I will get counselling once I get home, but that will be in at least a week.
Arranging 24 hour care
We’re told that dad will need round the clock care when he comes home from the hospital. How do we arrange this?
Help us improve palliative care in Ontario!
Team Losing Our Parents is participating in the 2011 Healing Cycle Ride to raise funds for hospice palliative care in Ontario. 100% of donations go directly to improving hospice palliative care, which we believe is a VERY important cause. Why? You probably assume that when someone you love nears end of life they will receive…
Moving and homecare
We’re moving to another city and would like to take our elderly aunt. How do we make sure her homecare continues?
Finding Peace
Dear Mary,
My parents are both in declining health. My Father has been in the nursing home for about a year and a half and my Mother just joined him in the nursing home about 5-6- weeks ago. They are being taken care of. My brother is the nearest caretaker and handles a lot of situations.
I live 600 miles away.
I know that this situation is for the best for everyone, my parents and my brother especially. However, I don’t feel good about it at all.
I just visited them in April and I could visit them again. I’m not sure this will help me feel any better.
How can I be at peace with their being in the nursing home?
Thanks for your advice,
Melissa D.
Conversations that matter: Talking about money with aging parents
Some conversations in life truly matter. Talking about money issues is perhaps one of the most important and difficult conversations to have with aging parents. It takes courage and planning. Most of us do not want to talk or even think about our parents’ declining health, let alone financial matters, so how can we volunteer to learn, understand and help our parents as they age?
Read Conversations that matter: Talking about money with aging parents
I’m So Tired!
I take of my parent’s full time. They have moved into my home and although this has decreased my travel time, it has increased the amount of care that I give them. They are even more dependent on me than before. I am so tired and feel so alone. Do you have any ideas to make our lives better?
Donna
So Far Away
I live far away from my parents. My sister does most of the care giving for them. How can I help?
Steve
Live-in or live out care?
Is live-in or live-out care better for someone living on their own and what are the cost differences?
Open to Hope Book
I am honoured to have one of my stories included in this new hard cover book just out this week on Amazon. This is an American Foundation out of Chicago. They are dedicated to helping people who deal with grief by helping them to move past their grief. The stories in the book are inspirational…